Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Julie's LiveJournal:

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Tuesday, February 28th, 2012
12:22 pm	As the world turns A few weeks back an article about stimulant medication in the New York Times caught my eye. Originally it was titled Ritalin Gone Wrong, but later editions I think changed the title to something less pointed. After reading it, I discontinued taking ADD meds immediately. A week later I ran all this past my doctor and got the green light to move forward. What I discovered with the help of that article is that, while ADD may be an issue in my life, by far the more vexing problem is anxiety. It always has been. The earliest incident that gave my parents concern had to do with perfectionism and paralysis, not an absent mindedness or distraction. So, after 21 years, at this point I've said goodbye to the meds that made my heart pump in unusually quick and strong pulses, the meds that never let me nap as a college student, and the meds that kept me living three to six hours at a time, unable to plan beyond. And with this change, I've joined the world of coffee drinkers. It's my more socially acceptable ritual. I can go over all the ways anxiety has hinderd me socially, professionally, academically...but you likley already know those. I could write about the recent weekend I stayed at my parents' home caring for my Minnesota nieces, acting as interpreter between the littles and my parents and all of the horrible memories that revived resulting in dreams wherein I'm strangled multiple times by my mother. I could write about how much I enjoy working at the choirs of my childhood, and how wonderful it feels to work where I'm appreciated and respected, and where the artists value my input, even without a diploma on my wall. I could tell you all kinds of things, but for now, I'll keep it at "Cheers!" I hope this finds you well. Love, Julie (Comment on this)
Tuesday, May 31st, 2011
12:09 pm	We are family. I've been busy over the last two weeks helping out with my nieces while my sister and brother-in-law in St. Paul moved a few blocks to a bigger house. I'm not a parent but truly enjoy kids, and after a week + of child care, I think it started to sink in a bit about parenthood. It doesn't stop. They don't go away. They will be awake at 6:15 for breakfast and will need discipline at that early hour as well. Every day. For months or years at a time. I had a wonderful time and was glad to be in a position able to assist. But I came home tired. In the meantime, I've taken a part time job at a daycare working the closing shift hours, and this also has been fun. Right now I'm still observing, but there are a couple things I'd like to influence. Like addressing me by name, and "please" and "thank you". I'm really not hard to get along with. Let's start with the basics. Niece JoJo goes to a Montessori preschool and I've often thought I'd have had more success as a student in a Montessori environment, though I've no experience with it. When I mentioned this to my therapist I was nearly scoffed at, and told directly that a child with ADD in a Montessori environment would never get anything done. That may or may not be the case, and in general my therapist is very supportive and helpful, but I tend to resent the idea that I can't help myself. So I checked out a book by Maria Montessori about the Montessori teaching method, and what strikes me so far is the discipline required of the teacher. That would be a challenge. My brain is stirring and it feels good. At this point, the 20 hours a week at the daycare is not covering my bills, but working with children is more in line with my soul than my previous job. And that alone makes for a much happier Julie. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Wednesday, March 16th, 2011
11:46 am	Bear and grin it when you're in it I'd relayed the story before to my therapist, but apparently not all of it. That came out last Thursday and I've tail spun since. Being sick just fueled the desperation. I'm coming around. Realizing that I'd intentionally chosen to feel oppressed kind of threw me. I felt it was my only option at the time. And as with parents, I can't fault myself back then, as I did the best I could with what I had to work with. I survived, which was my only conscious purpose. At this point, I'm looking for other responses. Noting that the bills or the crap on my dresser that won't clear itself off aren't out to get me. And the thank you notes that should be sent to the nice people who have granted me interviews aren't trying to accost me. I fear I have trouble distinguishing crazy in the real world. Growing up, I took on a clear bias. I knew my nemesis. I was right. Turns out, that has served me badly. Without a clear opposition, I second guess my responses, and secretly hedge against everything. (are you the bad guy?) Because the real point (still) isn't the other, but me. And that never was my focus. So, if the focus can turn to me, and just me, then the bills, the dresser top, and the thank you notes may follow without contempt or anxiety. That's part of the idea anyway. A blast back to childhood cartoons: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7_cMaGt52QE&feature=related (Comment on this)
11:28 am	Post from a while ago that didn't post for reasons unknown. Church. I've never felt like a religous person. Trapped by the do's and don'ts, it felt more a social order, a thing to do, a community to belong, than a spiritual journey. My family was heavily involved in the church, and as part of that family, so was I. Freshman year I was on Student Congregation council. But it never was what I was looking for....it didn't help me, but disabled me instead. Too many internal conflicts would not allow anything other than my own mind medal inside me. I have not been involved in a religious institution since college, but for attending Christmas and Easter services, and baptisms as part of my family clan. I'd looked into the Unitarian church, and the day I finally made it out the door to attend, I rear ended someone on Kingshighway. It's a sign, or I didn't care enough, or whatever the reason, I haven't attempted to go back. Meanwhile, I'm just this side of destitute and barely made March rent and will very shortly have serious trouble with bills. So, stress. I've met with my old friend Jill over a few weeks and we've done yoga just for kicks, and I enjoyed it very much. She let me borrow the DVD for the week. I've also taken to watching St. Olaf church and chapel services online. I went so far as to print out the daily class schedule, and scheduled myself to play piano and work out and apply for jobs and do yoga, etc...into the class periods. So far, so good. Though I'm finding writing cover letters exceedingly difficult as self promotion is an extremely uncomfortable proposition. That's my task at this point. As Odd Todd would say, I need monay. indeed. The chapel services have been heartwarming. St. Olaf's brand of ELCA Lutheran is much different from my parents' church. Maybe because it's Minnesota or an academic setting, but I'm more receptive to Pastor Benso (Comment on this)
Saturday, February 5th, 2011
1:51 pm	Random Thoughts I'm on the verge of finishing The Lucifer Effect which I started reading back in '07. 2/3 of the way through the book it got too intense. I've determined to get through it with only 50 or so pages to go, but this information is the reason I lost it in the first place. Believing these things could happen and being a music major in rural Minnesota with no pull and a confused irritable mind. A simple understanding of right and wrong, good and bad. War = bad. To be avoided. And I've feared that my moral constitution is not very strong and I could pretty easily turn the way of the abusive soldiers. The power of suggestion is strong. Raised on implications and silent "understandings". Renditions to Egypt. And today we have journalists arrested in Egypt. But Egypt is such a great ally! Aggravated. Meanwhile, it's inappropriate for NBC to lump news and sports in one category on their website. That's all for now. Current Mood: time to talk of other things (Comment on this)
8:39 am	Hey all! It's not easy being unemployed, especially when you have zero income. It's becoming stressful. HOWEVER. This has been one of the best times in my life. I am defined not by an institution, an illness, or my family. This morning, I'm happy. It's snowing and beautiful out my window. I've been able to spend some time with some of my oldest friends on the planet, and those have been joyful occasions. I hope you enjoy your Saturday. Love, Julie Current Mood: happy (Comment on this)
Friday, January 14th, 2011
9:03 am	"You take care of yourself." - Grandpa Cobra paperwork and payment have been sent off. Netflix is on hold. Membership to Richmond Heights RecPlex is paid and active. Choral festival is complete. Thanksgiving is complete. Grandpa sick, visited, died, visited, buried. Christmas festivities complete. New Years complete. Swearing In complete. Winter cold...nearing completion. Stay strong, they say. Be strong. I wonder if strong isn't just a defense. An inability to adapt. Strong, stubborn, German. Inflexible. Focused. Principled. Moral ambiguity. Fun and laughter. Consistency. Love. Family and friends. Hope. "Faith and Optimism." Living one day at a time. My hopes for my future include more laughter and more hugs. Current Mood: calm (Comment on this)
Sunday, January 9th, 2011
12:11 pm	Working Title Leaving my job was the right move. My grandpa died early morning on Christmas Eve. His cat, Chatzy, is living with my parents right now. Meeting one of their old "Monday Night Club" friends, Rosalie Lovingwell, was a joy. These old folks are sharp with their wit, and they truly seem to remember like it was yesterday. I enjoyed watching her light up talking about "Chatz". All of the Monday Night Club hailed from North St. Louis which was it's own sort of exclusive club apparently. Except for my grandmother. "Well, Chatzy could fit in with anyone." She, and my grandpa, were very well loved. Mark was sworn in to the bench of Ramsey County last Wednesday and I had the opportunity to attend along with the rest of my family. While there I stayed and got to visit with Megan which was absolutely wonderful. T'was a much welcomed change of pace. Now I'm back home, looking for ways to keep myself occupied that involve more face time with other humans. Current Mood: complacent (Comment on this)
Wednesday, November 17th, 2010
9:52 am	This adventure called life. "You have to work really hard to find apathy around here." - current St. Olaf student interview online. All avenues are open and I cannot find my unofficial transcript from Olaf to take and discuss with various colleges around town. So, searching for procedures online I stumbled upon the above note. I'm still terribly in love with that school. The transcript request form asks for your student ID # if you remember it. I think I know it, but searching for verification found my student planners from back in the day. The line above I found inspiring, but reading through my own experience there, I was obsessive. About everything. And terrified. And I cared about everything. I was a walking bleeding heart. It's awkward and painful to read, so those are back on the bookshelf now, student number left unfound. I'd like to have the drive and motivation of the Olaf years, but tempered, conscious, more deliberate, and much less anxious. This is my opportunity to try that out. Also, note to all: If you find yourself in an emotionally manipulative and abusive environment, leave it. You'll instantly loose five pounds and revert to your natural state of Loving Life. It's good stuff. :) Current Mood: pretty good (Comment on this)
Thursday, November 11th, 2010
7:37 am	Unemployment - Day 2 Monday I did something the world would consider really dumb, and I fear I'll forget the reasons for doing it, because it feels so right to be away from there. I gave notice to my job that I'd be leaving, asap. And Tuesday evening, I was done. There is no back up plan. It was a long five years. In some respects, a colossal waste of time. But, ironically, I stayed for my mental health. The anti-anxiety meds have arrived, so I am sorted for 3 months, at which point this all could possibly become prohibitively expensive. Yesterday I was an anxious mess, trying to spin it into happy productivity. They sometimes mimic each other, and the question then is, what's so bad about anxious messy happy productivity? Last night I got out to babysit my cousins sons again, and they gave me a huge tupperware of pasta. Free Meal! At 11:30 I was in bed, and now at 7:30 I'm awake again. And out of bed. And not hating life. Amazing. The scary part is thinking into the black hole of "what's next?". The future is wide open. I expect I'll land on my feet, I just have no idea what the landscape will look like. Current Mood: hopeful (Comment on this)
Tuesday, October 19th, 2010
9:02 am	DPS left out The Happy Isles It's not that I stopped caring. That's not it at all. It wasn't my party and the host / guest of honor was saying angry things. My inside wanted to jump to defenses, but I felt it wasn't my place. He'd been drinking. I disagreed with and was hurt by what I thought I'd heard. Although he was loud in his anger, I heard the tone and was desperately trying not to hear. I didn't want to hear without fighting back. And I thought fighting back would be out of place, since I cannot account for behavior. So I left. Writing has not bitten me, so I've turned to audio recordings. It's a different experience. My speaking style moves in fits and starts as ideas come to mind. It's a little easier to get thoughts out fast enough that it's first out in raw form and then I can hear myself talk through the self-editing process. Current Mood: sick day (Comment on this)
Saturday, October 2nd, 2010
9:20 am	The Social Network Last night I saw The Social Network. It was well done. Where were you in November '03? Where were you in February '04? Recommended. Where I was: November 11, 2003 - decided to leave St. Olaf. February 2004 - unemployed, destitute, stealing petty change from a bowl in the closet of the condo in which I was staying to fill my gas tank, 29 cents at a time. Current Mood: yawn (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Saturday, September 25th, 2010
12:38 pm	beyond the sunset.... I've been reading Shop Class as Soulcraft by Matthew Crawford off and on for a month or so and recommend it to everyone who's....well, to everyone. It's "An inquiry into the value of work", and that sums it up. But for me, and probably other creative types unhappy with paper pushing, it's enlightening and made me happy. Someone understands. Because we're all creative types. Summer has broken and I, in turn, broke from my sequestered habits in my one air conditioned room. That helps my spirit. Earlier this week I noticed and felt sort of lost. But grasping at memories, guess what? It's the good ones that come back. I remembered much that I learned, and the inspiration. All the books I've read. The Count of Monte Cristo is still on my shelf, started a few times, but has not yet been consumed. I'll get to it. So this week I've retreated a bit back into my mind. It isn't a terrible place to be. It is getting much better. Getting more comfortable the longer I know it as a safe place to be, a safe place to spend time. The advice is to write more. Probably not here. Maybe though. I wrote miles of messiness years ago, and since then have stopped writing completely. It's been years. My sister thinks I have lots to say and funny ways of saying it. She gave me a beautiful big new journal for my birthday this year. I'm just not sure how to start. ------------------- In other news: The Mosque in lower Manhattan is an issue for lower Manhattan and the rest of the world should butt out. The DREAM Act is an interesting idea, but I do not support non-citizens fighting in our military. DADT should be repealed because I do not feel safer with 14,000 fewer troops. I still love Minnesota Public Radio. Last night my mom called to tell me about massive flooding in Northfield. How she learned about it, I don't know. But now you know too! Current Mood: calm (Comment on this)
Wednesday, June 30th, 2010
7:09 am	Mary, Eric, & 11 month old Emily flew off to Greece yesterday for a two week tour with the Athens Saxophone Quartet. Oh boy. My dad headed to KC to help Eric construct a pergola over their back deck. Eric recorded it all for posterity and posted the week long video project on Facebook. It's truly a celebration of Fathers around fathers day to see my 64 year old dad climbing around on ladders and lumber 30 feet in the air with staple gun & level. Such a monkey! He looked as though he was having a great time. For anyone who's planning DIY construction projects, Eric recommends Google Sketchup as a free design tool. Build your own pergola for example. (Comment on this)
Tuesday, June 22nd, 2010
8:34 pm	A generation before my own. I think he ruined her life. We never did approve of it. She never fit in with his family. We never told our girls what to do. I think he ruined her life. We never did approve of it. She never fit in with his family. We never told our girls what to do. I think he ruined her life. We never did approve of it. She never fit in with his family. We never told our girls what to do. We never told our girls what to do. We never told our girls what to do. Current Mood: void (Comment on this)
Wednesday, April 21st, 2010
6:55 pm	I'm not a total loss! You've got to believe it'll be alright again. Short update. (ha! Just kidding.) My personal psych. anniversary came and went - forgotten! Time heals all things, or life goes on, or something. No fan fare. no drama. No moment of silence. No remembrance. Just a restful and productive Saturday at home with my cat. (See userpic) Somehow I ended up extremely tight on change this month. I guess it was a rolling debt from our trip out to San Francisco, but it lead to an immediate tightening of the money belt, and proof, meet pudding, I can totally be frugal. Should I have a credit card? Probably. For moments like that? Most certainly. It's what adults do, right? However, know thyself. It's a similar reason I'm okay having more taxes deducted during the year, as I prefer not to think about and save for some unknown looming tax payment the following Tax Reconciliation Day. .... As part of Mark's campaign for Judge in Ramsey County, he's assembled a team for a 5k Race For Justice on Nicollet Island this Sunday. Mary and Emily will drive up Friday during the day, and I'll fly in that night. I'm excited for a sister reunion this weekend. Along with all four nieces. And Mark. :) ...... There were some adventures in lap swimming at the local community rec plex. The short version is that I can move myself from one end of a pool and back, but I bet I could be much more efficient. This pool has only three lap lanes, and in this area of life, I really don't like to share. It's a self conscious sentiment. I could just say that other people really shouldn't want to share a lane with me, not worry about it, and just plow them over, you know, underwater style. But in practice, I'm just more inclined to leave. ....... St. Louis will host an international choir festival the weekend before Thanksgiving. I attended the steering committee meeting, and .... we'll see. It was awkward being back in what never became my world. But everyone there seemed pleased I'd attended. I won them over with my snazzy one liner introduction. A whole big rats nest of emotions around that....to be continued. ....... Recent digging took me back to some St. Olaf friends - pre SPC, pre-psych anniversary. We explored some of the emotions around the whole big clusterfuck that was April '03 to April '04. Between straight laced, straight A, highly driven friends, to a laid back acceptance, to safe harbor provided in Rand, .... and the inability to connect or reconnect with those friends in their insular world. ... back in the day, we had so much fun! Our goody-two-shoes, outrageously silly, immature but clever, fun. God, there are pictures somewhere. They're all still in touch, traveling to destination weddings for each other. ....... ....... And now it's time for dinner, cleaning, laundry, packing, etc. Because, again, it's gonna be a good weekend. Current Mood: yes (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Monday, March 29th, 2010
6:41 pm	Not much new. Just checking in. Still restless and ready for spring. Spring and fall are tough times for me. Yesterday I went to a baby shower for Erin and Matt and met up with two grade school friends and a classmate from high school. It was an oddly pleasant experience. The classmate from high school I never new very well, but enjoyed talking with her yesterday. Her personality seems very calm. I'm different from when I was in high school, and most people do change, but for me it's drastic, it's inorganic, it's meds, and it's good. We chatted about The Biggest Loser, as Erin and I watch together on Tuesday nights. She apparently is also a fan. She reacted to one players over-reaction to a non-incident as the guy just needed to calm down. My reaction was that he should try some mood stabilizers. Though I didn't state that response out loud. In the past I would have, and there isn't really a reason that I should not have now. I guess I just didn't feel much like sharing. Work is the same, though fewer people all the time. Over Memorial Day weekend I'm headed to St. Paul for Kathleen's baptism. My brother-in-law is running for Ramsey County Judge. www.voteireland.com A while ago I guess I mentioned dealing with death, and all people mentioned have since died, except Grandpa, who still won't move to assisted living. I have tickets with some friends for a taping of NPR's Wait Wait Don't Tell Me in mid April. Yay. I've also been making my way through The Once and Future King, and a passage I liked went something like: Wart was upset for some reason, and Merlin's advice for when one finds oneself upset is to learn something new. In the past that method was extremely unsuccessful, but about now I think I just might have better luck. Cheers, Julie Current Mood: complacent (Comment on this)
Thursday, January 28th, 2010
8:21 pm	Bet you wish you were inside my brain right now. Best therapy session yet. We Laughed! :) I've done a few good things for myself recently. First, I spent most of my christmas money on a digital piano I'd been eyeing since October. I have the UPS delivery attempt notice IN MY HAND!!! I'll pick it up tomorrow morning on my way to work. Ladysmith Black Mambazo was featured on Independent Lens on PBS in a documentary, that mixed music, culture, copyright law, history, folk music...pretty much everything I love, into one. Once a number of years ago someone pointed me to a website about 43 things, where people make lists of 43 things they want to do before they die. I never signed up, but the thought crossed my mind that it would probably be good for me to be more involved in activities I truly enjoy, rather than things I find okay, or don't mind. See Ladysmith Black Mambazo in concert was one of them. Lo! and Behold! They're performing at the Sheldon in February. Tickets are mine! Really, they are. They're in my other hand. (Also on the list are going to a taping of The Daily Show &/or The Colbert Report in NYC....and probably some other stuff, but I've misplaced that list now. [I guess that's one reason to put it online.]) I've liked them since I was a little kid. The kids radio station back in the day (95.5 FM) played "Sisesiqhingini (Everything Is So Stupid)". You can hear a clip here. It's one of those random tidbits that's stayed with me. Love it. Tonight at my appointment we talked dishes. Again. The entire universe is wrapped up in my relationship with dishes. To the point that it's not conscious. I just think 'I'd rather not.' and sit down and play bejeweled on facebook for hours. Lots of hours. But most of the universe relates indirectly at best to dishes. Water scarcity, Ag subsidies, wastefulness, taking out the trash, money wasted on wasted food, this is what employment is all about, we should all grow our own food, I don't like spending money on food, I don't want to cook with teflon, I should buy all bamboo utensiels, I don't have room for all this stuff in my kitchen, I'm allergic to mold, we should cook more often, there's high fructose corn syrup in everything, schools should not allow soda machines in cafeterias, school shouldn't start at 7:10 a.m., the vending machine shouldn't charge my credit card three dollars for a soda, etc etc ad infinitum. The moral of the session, is we want to keep it conflict free. Rinsing a plate and putting it in the dishwasher is only indirectly related to our wars for oil. Mortality Two weeks ago my sisters were in town for birthday-palooza. My mom hosted an open house for a birthday weekend show & tell with all three girls at home, along with the newest granddaughters. I was running late for the shindig up North when I checked my email one last time, like you do when you're running late, and learned from an Obama volunteer that another volunteer has terminal breast cancer, and has for five years. She's pretty much in the last stages, prayers, cards, gifts, warm thoughts all are welcome. This absolutely floored me. This woman always seemed a bit odd. One of those genius types with some social awkwardness. She also had a fierce spirit, and a bitter, wry sense of humor. She seemed like she might have been sickly but never seemed actually sick. I'm not one to pry & never asked. We weren't ever close, but I could always count on her being at any gathering or event, and being a kindly, welcoming face in the crowd. I expected she'd be around four years from now when we get to do it all again. She's a classic health care crisis story. A classic tragedy. It seemed unlike me, but I immediately pulled out a card from my stash, thought, and wrote the most personal Thank You card I've yet to write. She's inspiring, and I thought people would just know I think that of them. As she and I were casual friendly acquaintances at best, I doubt she'd given me a second thought at all. I just wanted her to know how far one person can reach. Later that weekend, we were at my aunts house for yet another birthday dinner, and framed in her kitchen is a colorful print. http://www.artisanshand.com/images/storepix/nap425lifeisshorw.jpg I just smiled. There's lots of back story that there isn't time or need to share. The short version is that I love my family, and I've enjoyed getting to know my aunt better since being back in St. Louis. Later that week at yet An Other birthday dinner, we were out on the town at one of the nicest restaurants money can buy in STL. Grandpa was a big fuss for part of the time, and in the midst of it all, he said something enlightened. "Don't worry about me. I'm just 92." Grandpa could play that line many different ways, but this time, it was that an aged body just comes with the territory. It's the first time I've heard him say "don't worry about me" since grandma died. He's a good man. Last week he told my mom he won't move out of his house. That same day my mom spontaneously took off to Indiana to meet with an old friend of hers from Girl Scouts. (for her birthday I bought us both trips to a spa. THAT will be an interesting time. She can't sleep and still can't relax, because she's in a perpetual state of anxiety about grandpa.) Right. So she took off for Indiana, came back on a Sunday and recognized that newspapers were piling up on their elderly neighbors driveway. They have a key, as good neighbors do. Upon investigation, found her dead on the floor of her bedroom. She'd been there for at least three days. Not really what mom needed. Not what I needed to hear. I didn't sleep really well. Didn't do dishes. And drowned in hours upon hours of facebook bejeweled. Bought a piano. Bought some tickets. Who said money can't buy happiness? At this point, I'm late for a showing of Harry Potter II (whichever one that is.) And the moral of this story - I use too much punctuation. I use punctuation incorrectly. And frankly my dear, I don't give a damn. Thank You and Goodnight!!! (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, January 11th, 2010
6:35 pm	"Never again is what you swore the time before" Team of Rivals - finished. Zoey acts as though she wishes she were an alley cat, rummaging through all of the cardboard boxes left over from...well, a number of occasions, most of which were not Christmas. I've had some very odd dreams lately. I enjoy dreaming and remembering my dreams. They keep waking life interesting. Not til I remember a dream do I realize how sadly absent they've been. I'm stalling taking my christmas tree down because I like the soft light it provides. The standard lighting in my apartment is stark. I bet I could affect that situation. I'm addicted to bejeweled on facebook. It's bad. Very bad. It caused some problems Junior year. I also hope to take voice lessons again this spring. Registration is next Tuesday, which is Biggest Loser night....some how I'll swing it. Before lessons begin however, I'm in the market for a digital piano. My parents gifted me an unexpected sum of money for Christmas, so I think a nice digital piano would be a worthwhile way to spend it. I'm looking at a Yamaha P85. mmmmmmmm. yum. Meanwhile, my days go on. I do entertain myself throughout the day and some of my favorite time is spent on hold with one of our business partners in Colorado. Their hold music is THE BEST. Today brought "Relax" by Frankie Goes to Hollywood, followed by "My Girl". I've outed myself to my compatriots over there as a total nerd. In fact, I often wish I worked with them, rather than where I do. They're nice, and funny, and silly...my kind of silly. I sing to them when they finally pick me up off of hold, finishing whatever line was left off from their hold music. Today brought Harry Potter references as side notes. It's like communicating in code, at least to the rest of the people in my office. Ah well. Last night I fell in to watching Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire on ABC. I don't believe I completed that book, but it put me in the mood to complete the series. First in cue though is still The Once and Future King, since it's on loan from my friends dad's library. I'd started it back in 2007 and it was promptly stolen with the rest of my car. So, back on track. Current Mood: high (Comment on this)
Sunday, January 3rd, 2010
10:48 pm	Abruptness The Christmas holiday involved a lot of family time, and time to observe. Many times my family make decisions very quickly. They don't seem measured or deliberative. It's fairly reflexive. Then I learned a new story about my Grandma. She had a beautiful hand carved wooden bureau. The decorative carving went up around the top of the doors with a large lovely oval and swirls around the edging. When they moved to my grandpas current house in 1965 or so, the piece was too tall to fit through the door, so she chopped off the top, straight through the middle of the decorative carvings. I'd never seen the piece before, but went wandering around the house since grandpa likely will be moving from there soon. It's down in the basement laundry / storage room. My mom came to find me. My mom's handwriting looks just like her mothers'. There are tens of boxes each labeled with the contents, date and occasion of receipt. One that struck me was something sewn by a friend of theirs. The box notes this friend made it while her husband went to night school for his engineering degree back in the 1940's. It took seven years to complete. I also found her old braille typewriter. Except for during the war, I don't think she held a regular job, but kept busy volunteering all over town. One place was the Missouri School for the Blind. Mom said that a book Grandma transcribed into braille is in the Library of Congress. I went searching online to find it, but knowing exactly as much about it as I wrote in that last sentence, was unable to find it. She also volunteered at the Carondelet Historical Society. (I thought she typed the braille book for that society...I could be wrong.....). I do remember that I went with Grandma there once when I was little. She stopped by to pick up some things. I was small, but I do remember this room. It looks exactly the same. Being a museum, it's supposed to. It feels eerie. Well, it's time for bed. G'night. (Comment on this)